Misled By Role Identification

We can be confused by the difference between a person's behavior and the role we believe they represent.

People fill different societal roles for different reasons, and it often isn’t just because they have ideas that are a natural fit for that role.

Christians,

In trying to understand the world around you, it is important to understand that one reason people can act in a way that seems confusing is because the role they seem to be in is not suited to their underlying mindset.  People fill different societal roles for different reasons, and it often isn’t just because they have ideas that are a natural fit for that role.  This can cause you to try to rely on someone and be very disappointed or see major contradictions between what you thought people stood for and what they say and do, leaving you very confused about what you see around you and what you end up thinking you believe about people. 

Consider a college student named Vern who notices someone in the cafeteria who seems very popular because of how he is surrounded by other people. Vern also notices he has a skateboard by his table and a phone on a stand for a live stream; he also has a shirt on that says, “Be Different by Loving People” and seems to fit what you could call the "skater-boy” role.  An idea that is commonly associated with this role is going against norms to be non-judgmental and tolerant, for example.  Wanting the same attention as the “skater boy,” Vern buys a skateboard and similar clothing. Vern then appears in the cafeteria not long after in skater-boy attire.

“Hey, it’s the skater boy,” someone says as Vern walks in. They ask Vern if they can take a few pictures of him.  After he’s done posing for the shots, a girl who is normally shy works up the courage to ask if she can take a picture with him—she associates the role he seems to fill with a friendly person.  Vern looks at her and notices she is a girl who normally sits by herself in two of his classes and he decides he doesn’t want to be seen with her in the picture.  He says, “…maybe later” and walks off.